7/25/2011
Love and Intimacy
“What’s love got
to do with it?”
Dimensions of Intimacy
„
Physical
„
Emotional
„
Intellectual sharing
„
What is Intimacy?
The dictionary defines “intimacy” as
arising from:
♥ Close union
♥ Close contact
♥ Close association, or
♥ Close acquaintance
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7/25/2011
Intimacy is present in
Friendships!
„
Friendship:
„
„
„
Close
friends
Relationship of choice
Exists over time
“Other”
friends
Between people
who share a
Social network
common history
Acquaintances
Triangular Theory of Love
All loving relationships can be described
according to three dimensions:
Passion
Commitment
Intimacy
Dimensions of
Loving Relationships
R.J. Sternberg
(1986)
Intimacy
„
Commitment
„
„
„
Intimacy - trust, caring, honesty,
supportiveness, understanding, and
openness (think SELF DISCLOSURE).
Commitment - loyalty, devotion, putting
the other first, needing each other.
Passion – excitement, sexual interest
and activity, extreme longing (think
ROMANCE).
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7/25/2011
Triangular Theory of Love
Intimacy
Nonlove
Passion Commitment
<
Liking
<
Infatuated love
Empty love
Romantic love
Compassionate love
Fatuous love
Consummate love
<
<
<
<
<
<
<
<
<
<
Triangular Theory of Love
Liking
Romantic
Love
Intimacy
+
Passion
Infatuation
Intimacy
Consummate
Love
Passion
Compassionate
Love
Intimacy
+
Commitment
Commitment
Fatuous Love
Empty Love
Passion
+
Commitment
Love is…
Eros (sexual)
„ Ludis (game)
„ Storge (friends/family)
„ Mania (obsessive)
„ Pragma (practical)
„ Agape (selfless)
„
John Alan Lee
(sociologist)
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7/25/2011
Maintaining Commitment
in an Intimate Relationship
„
„
Support our partners (encouragement, listening,
courtesy)
Reassure our partners
„
„
„
Work on the relationship
„
„
„
Of our love/feelings
Of value of relationship
Current relationship (managing conflict, expressing trust
Creating a future (making plans, doing things together)
Behave with integrity
„
Honesty, trustworthiness, faithfulness
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